Is Your Relationship Causing You Anxiety…

Posted by on Mar 21, 2017 in Anxiety Treatment

Is Your Relationship Causing You Anxiety…

Anxiety plays a huge part in many of the relationships issues that I treat today. For those who are already suffering from an Anxiety Disorder, stress from being in a relationship can only heighten their symptoms. Love is one of the most powerful emotion that can be experienced by human beings. Therefore, relationship anxiety is sure to be a factor at some point in most relationships.

So what are some typical causes of relationship anxiety? Anxiety can mean something different to different individuals and the causes of anxieties can and does vary individually as well. As we explore some of the most common causes of relationship anxiety, check out which ones hold true for you.

Constant fighting.
Fighting usually comes from some source of negative impact in the relationship. Anger is usually the end result of unfinished business in the relationship. Couples who fight often, tend to have more anxiety in their relationship than those who don’t. The feeling of the relationship not working, and thoughts about it not lasting, are usually a common thread that exist in these relationships. Couples may tend to feel like they are walking around on eggshells in order to keep the peace.

Trust issues.
Trust, or the lack of trust in relationships can create a ton of anxiety, especially if there has been infidelity in the relationship. Infidelity is one of the fastest destroyers of trust in any relationship. For couples who have gone through this type of stressor, the anxiety that they go through by re-living the experience can create overwhelming tension. Once trust is broken in a relationship, it will be very difficult to regain it again.

Lack of support and taken for granted.
As time progresses in most relationships the support that once was there, may now be a part of history. Couples may feel like they are being taken for granted over time. The language coming from each other may seem unfriendly, hostile and unsupportive. Couples can tend to be negative and harsh towards one other. Research indicates that couples are more negative towards each other than to strangers.

Overall stress from relationships can build up over time. This stress may come from raising children, financial stress, elderly or sickly parents, chronic illness from either partner, and general struggling in the relationship, all can wreak havoc over time. When one is struggling with any of the above stressors, anxiety will be a natural source.

Overwhelming “What Ifs”
Lately this has been one of the most prominent sources of anxiety with my clients. The overwhelming and never ending “what ifs”. It’s insurmountable and creates a source of worry that is undeniable and unmistakable. As we all know “what ifs” can be endless, it fails to put fourth every possibility there is or ever could be of what could go wrong in every relationship. This worthless use of energy creates a tireless amount of stress in relationships. The useless worrying about what can go wrong is relentless. It’s usually always negative and can snowball into uncontrollably worrying.

Putting Your Relationship Anxiety Under Control

In one of my past blogs I discussed the importance of communication in relationships, especially when couples take each other for granted. Effective communication is key to any relationship, it’s a must have ingredient. If you are not communicating, make it a priority to talk everything out until both parties have understood clearly what’s at stake. Make your needs and concerns clear to one other, there shouldn’t be any room left for guessing. Even if it hurts to be honest, this is not the time to hold anything back.

Starting over with trust
This is a big one, especially when infidelity has been the cause. Trust is hard to rebuild once it is broken, but it can be done. This is a time when hard work will be necessary. You may have to start over from scratch with your relationship, to help rebuild the trust you once had. This will be a difficult journey, but if your relationship is worth saving it has to be done.

Showing more affection
Especially in relationships when partners may feel like they are been taken for granted. There is a saying ” it’s not what you say, but what you do that really matters”. This holds true in this case. You may know that your partner loves you, but wouldn’t it be nicer if he/she said it more often and also took actions that displays that love and affection. There is an undeniable feeling that takes over when words are expressed but then followed by actions. Actions tend to hold much more weight, than just mere words alone.

Utilizing Anxiety strategies
One of the easiest ways to reduce some symptoms of anxiety is by working out and exercising. It’s by far, one of the most proven ways to help reduce anxiety. Other anxiety strategies may include meditation, practicing mindfulness technique, yoga and other stress related strategies. Explore what works best for you.

Anxiety can be caused by many outside sources and factors, but relationship anxiety is specific for many individuals. Most of the issues that I hear during sessions, even individual therapy sessions are related to anxieties caused by relationships. They take up the most of our time and efforts, because emotions and feelings are involved. If you are experiencing anxiety due to your relationship, hopefully the tips here can help you better understand them. If further help is necessary, take the first and get back on track with your relationship.